Much of peoples’ success is determined by how well they can influence other people – either winning them over to their opinions or shaping the way other people think about things. In our professional lives, we are faced with this challenge daily.
My clients often ask out of a sense of frustration how they can win people around to their way of thinking. One suggestion I make is to acutely observe a politician such as Barack Obama in action or to listen to and watch someone they admire tackle an issue. Make some notes about how Obama presents himself. Is his physical presence calm and steadfast or is it pacey like Hilary Clinton’s? How does he answer the question he is being asked? Directly - or skirting the main issue? What impression does he leave with you?
Watch and see if he uses the language of the interviewer with a steady pace, respectful tone, measured yet fluid movement. Notice when he quickens his pace and adds momentum to the dialogue; when he begins to add human or personal touches and language or images that we can all relate to. Notice if his physical movement matches his tone, his pace, his approach to the other person and see if any of it doesn’t feel or look quite right.
How does he make you feel watching him? Have a look here
Now, the next time you need to influence someone critical to you, how do you want to make them feel and what are you prepared to do to make it work this time? I find it helpful to remind myself that:
- People will not remember what you said,
- People will not remember what you did,
- But they will remember how you made them feel.
